Handling Triggers

I received a text the other day from a group chat.

We are all coaches and support staff for high school athletes.

There was an athlete on our team in real mental health trouble, and I had conversed with his mom, the board, and the team captains about how to support him.

Nothing in the email directed towards me per se, but as I read it, I could feel my face flush, my chest tighten, and hot shivers go up into my head.

It was apparent I had been triggered.

The response I had to the text was a deep shame.

Thankfully I do not respond from this space very often anymore, and I gave myself several hours to sit and breathe with it.

It took a while before I could disengage, write a neutral response and then piece apart why it had brought that sensation in the first place.

In the past, I had tried to fix everything for everyone and put my nose in where it had no business being a lot.

I would charge in holding other people's causes that they couldn't bear for themselves.

Usually, the outcome was not disastrous, but it was never my place to be that upset and involved.

I am embarrassed about some of my old behavior.

I knew I had done nothing wrong this time, but I did still work on breathing and stepping back after I sent my reply.

While I had not taken extreme measures this time, I reached out to the mom and the captains and let them know I was here for help, but I have now disengaged unless called upon to be involved.

I want to spend some time away from the issue to ensure I act from a place of deep concern and not my old path.

How often do you get triggered without taking time to become aware of what has upset you?

Do you have the tools to recognize what you are doing in a heated moment?

Becoming aware of my triggers has brought me to a calmer state in how I interact and relate to others.

Please reach out if you want to learn how to do this for yourself.

Consultations in person or online are always free.